Disillusionment..Reality..Fiction..

revisiting an old indulgence

2011-10-17T17:57:00.000+05:30

These are the days..

2011-04-15T04:51:00.002+05:30

It's crazy how you meet hundreds of people through your life..
Brushing by each other.. but none of them every really touch you.
and then just one person changes everything..
makes you feel like your already everything you'll ever need to be.

So yes,Paul Simon, these are truly the days of miracle and wonder.

Old habits...Promises..Lies

2010-01-28T02:56:00.000+05:30

Ages since I heard your voice,

This is far from what would be my choice,

I'd give anything to see you smile,

Like a dawn I haven't seen in such a while,

I dream about you all the time,

Being with you is more than sublime,

You let me know I wasn't alone,

And showed me I wasn't on my own

So never forget my promise to you,

I will wait as I have to,

No matter what happens or how it hurts,

You will never have to go on a search,

For I will always be here,

Even to wait endless years,

And even after all the tears,

I will still be here for you,

As ever, I promised to do,

With a single hope to see you smile,

Doing anything to make it last awhile

But when you come,

I hope your smile is true

And the spark in your eye is glittering real

Alas, for so many doubts

I know that you can conceal

For now,

I stand on the other side of the bars

Looking into a world unknown

I see you standing pretending you're ok

But I know inside there’s too much doubt

I will wait, endlessly, if I must

Just to have my best friend back

By your cage I will stand, waiting

Until the day your bars will crack

Sing for the day

2009-12-08T12:01:00.003+05:30

As I gaze upon the sea of life,
And see Death's valleybefore me lie;

I feel assured I leave this strife,
To rest in peace
to rest forever beneath the sky
but hark a voice calls to me...

"be still and hear me"

Who is this intelligence I see
Staring in disbelief at me?
with gentle regard and kindly smile...

"listen to me, my lost chile
for you must sing as sweetly as you can.
Sing all the tunes you know.
Sweet is the life springing from death,
Sweeter still the day ahead
For to soon yet to rest
Spit on regret.
Damn the sorrow!
fight it with a stormy rage.
Curse the end, and blight the beginning if you must,
But live for the day,
And sing as sweetly as you can.
Listen not for the bells that ring tomorrow.
Make your music while you may".

impressions about "Him"

2009-12-07T23:20:00.002+05:30

impressions about "Him" in chronological order (over the last 3 months) :

- The almighty hope-your-there

- The puissant theres-something-wrong-here

- The great maybe

- The omnipotent could-be

- The divine definately-not-there

Dawn

2009-12-07T18:15:00.001+05:30

You smiled, you spoke, and I believed..

A wavering deep within the soul…

By every word and smile deceived…

Another man would hope no more !

Nor hoped what I hoped before

And in the depths of night my heart shall scream

Deceive, deceive me once again!

But in the early dawn do I see…

The blossoms die upon the tree

The leaves whither in the sun…

And I see…

Spring is done.

It goes now a wintry way

For love that smiled in October

Is false before Christmas day.

Questions ! Questions !

Was I wrong? Did I stray?

Why would this wound me so?

I ponder and I pray….

The only answer that I know…

Fare thee well, for I must leave,

In this parting do I grieve…

But no longer do I believe..

And so it is that we must part,

Adieu, adieu !

I can no longer wait for you,

I'll hang my harp on a willow tree,

And may the world go well with you…

Got hope ?

2009-12-07T15:10:00.003+05:30

Which hope we have as an anchor of our soul, both sure and steadfast

- Hebrews 6:19

The last dance

2009-11-23T01:11:00.004+05:30

Just when he thought that love had gone

Life was but shades of grey

She came into his life one day

As one last flimsy thread was drawn

hope, had once again found a way

What used to elude him more and more

yet she touched the center of his core

Being with her, he'd agree,

Unleashed his fear and set it free

With disbelief his heart would ask

Would this become another snare?

Will pain itself remove its mask

To face true love without a care?

In solitude his heart awaits

While trust had found its way again

With joyous leaps this life creates

A new beginning… another chance

May he have just one more dance ?

A picture can be magic

2009-10-07T02:22:00.003+05:30

He was in a fret...

because he didn't know where to start..or how to...

how would he go about recreating to magic of memory without the proper tools ?

After brooding about it...a sudden thought struck him...he DIDN'T need any tools !!

he could start on any blank surface...it didn't have to be a canvas or even a proper paper...

All it needed to be was white.

We call it white because we need a word but its true name is "nothing"

Black is the absense of light.. but white is the absense of memory.. the color of "can't remember"

What better medium than that of emptiness to create ? a seemingly endless void...almost begging to give birth to life.

Imagine the courage required to re-establish the world and draw that first line...

to bring back to life something that was...empty..

He picked up a pencil... hesitated... and then marked the white...

After the initial hesitation... the lines seemed to take on a life of their own..flowing seamlessly into one another

the white no longer an absense of memory...but it's very epitome.

but as for all things,this universe must create a balance...

where life is created..there it must be destroyed as well...

the first line drawn so hesitantly to create someting had also become a slot...

a jarring smudge on the white

a slot for blackness to pour through.

but a mark had been made and there was no going back...

The white...had been marked. and nothing would change that.

The Seven against Thebes

2009-09-16T22:44:00.001+05:30

Great Thebes,the mighty walled, I see

The seven gated town...

where brothers reigining annually ..passed too and fro the crown

Till Eteocles,despite the law...refuses with a frown

and the mighty Polyneices wars.. they burnt the city to the ground

The champions of argos, strive before each fearsome gate

Of seven who'll remain alive, is in the hands of fate

The brothers,at each others hand,are both for hades bound

Among those who come from much distant lands, two much missed friends are found

Tydeus,fighting axe in hand,is wounded by a foe - Melannipus, who makes a stand and lays the hero low..

but not before the axe in hand, has drunk it's longed for draft of blood

and severed from it's mighty trunk.. a head rolls in the mud

A final act of vengance when, before he meets his bane

the dead man's skull is spilt and Tydeus eats his brain

Amphiaraus,the god's own seer,fights firecely in the squall

and knowing that his end is near, triumphs over all !

A useless guesture, then he knows,avoiding fate to flee ?

for Zeus follows where he goes.. his thunderbolts the key

When lightning strikes, the earth will spasm,and he can only drive...

his steeds into a gaping chasm.. into hell alive

And greeted there upon the bank by the boatman of old,

who cares not for the trouble above and demands his ransom of gold.

------------------------------

Thought i'd get morbid in a more accepetable fashion this time :)

my personal favourite bit is the brains eating one :) I actually got the idea from a comic i was reading in office(!!!shh) and i found the story pretty interesting so i quickly googled it...

It's based on the story of "the Seven against Thebes" and "Eteocles and the Polyneices wars"

Incase your interested in the actual story, i refer you to a wiki link :

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Seven_Against_Thebes

and a google books link :

http://books.google.co.in/books?id=3xGfiqR5rjAC&pg=PA107&lpg=PA107&dq=Polyneices+wars&source=bl&ots=ZIIlcS4PPx&sig=NrPkynEv0M-VpAjFgxzWTHqgIEw&hl=en&ei=-dewSoaQK6iG6AP0wtzfAQ&sa=X&oi=book_result&ct=result&resnum=1#v=onepage&q=Polyneices%20wars&f=false

Comments ??

the blue depths call...

2009-08-19T11:05:00.002+05:30

Ever, in happiness, he had gone to the mountains
Some of the happiest times had been spent there.. and anyone who mattered had shared the serene beauty with him…

Ever, in sadness, he had run to the sea
During times of sorrow and loss, standing ankle deep at the edge, had always been a solace
A feeling that could not be shared..
In some indescribable manner, the sea seemed not only to be in sync with the sadness, it seemed to reflect an understanding… a comfort no human was capable of providing
Like a friend one meets after many long years yet no words are necessary
An ever patient acceptance
Unquestioning and ever understanding.. somewhat like a mother’s embrace, if one wished to be mawkish about it…

And once again in his life, he needed that friendship…
The time to leave had come…

*Sure.. sounds arbit.. but I really had trouble getting the words out in a way that would make sense
Sometimes, words just take on a mind of their own and simply have to be put down in whatever order they come out.. logical or not..whether you like it or not…

A heart's deepest fear

2009-08-12T00:55:00.003+05:30

Do any of us, execpt in our dreams, truly expect to be reunited with our heart's deepest loves ? Even when they leave us only for minutes and on the most mundane of errands ?
No, Not at all.
Each time they go from our sight we, in our secret hearts, count them as dead.
Having been given so much, we reason, how could we expect not to be brought as low as lucifer for the staggering presumption of our love ?
Sometimes these fears are unfounded and baseless..if we are lucky
Because sometimes they can be all too true.

Belief

2009-07-20T16:29:00.002+05:30

If, a year ago, someone had told him, he would be standing here, on the precipice of sanity, surrounded by dilemma… He would have laughed in their face... Time and again, he proudly used to tell everyone that the power of belief would be strong enough to tide anything over… “just believe in yourself” he used to smirk confidently…

And then the penny dropped… and hard.

Now, he had strangers walking up to him and telling him “life is good” “keep the faith” “It’s just a phase”… don’t give up hope! All those phrases he himself had blithely handed out like nuggets of wisdom from a cheap self help book

Is the hopelessness that apparent in his eyes? Can they see the terror, like that of a deer caught in the headlights and unable to move?

How does he tell them..it’s become like trying to climb some malevolent mountain… The treacherous stones giving way whenever he thought he had reached a stable out cropping and could rest…

Finding himself at the bottom, dusty and broken… staring up at the misty heights he’d been trying for so long to attain… Getting up each time had become increasingly difficult… This time, he can’t find the energy…

that final spark of hope has been extinguished..

Will he pick himself up?

Maybe a stranger will come along and guide him…

maybe even join him

Maybe together they will reach the top and discover a beauty undreamed of

Maybe… the grass will be green and the shade cool

The story is yet to play out….

Homecoming

2009-05-26T17:41:00.003+05:30

the door creaked as she pushed it open, the rusty hinges protesting after months of disuse and bad weather...
Almost as if they were unhappy at this intrusion into their private world
A thick layer of dust coated every surface...it was difficult to imagine people had once lived here.
As the door grudgingly opened to her pressure, as dust motes danced in the sunlight let in from behind her...
She blinked
and it seemed it seemed life had returned to the empty house...
She saw herself...a young child, un aware and uncaring of what life would bring... racing across the room followed by her pet dog...
She blinked
....and it was gone
She walked in....hesitantly exploring every room... and every room held a memory

Eating lightly salted water melon in the heat of her summer vacation
Watching her favorite movie for the umpteenth time on the dilapidated old color TV
sneaking her first drag of a cigarette up on the terrace
crying in the garden at her first heart break

So many memories... most of them faded and buried... all brought back to life by the dusty sights and smells
Finally, unable to bear the weight of the memories, she sank down to the floor, dust streaking her jeans...
The salty drops of water from her eyes creating shiny round jewels...
The house seemed to embrace her and they cried together, alone in the dusky light... alone in the world.
After what seemed like an eternity... although only a few minutes had passed... she pushed herself up, unmindful of the dirt... or maybe even finding comfort in it... a little something she could carry away with her...

She walked out, locking the door behind her... and walked away... not looking back.

She called me a few day later... and i asked
"did u visit the old place then ?"
"yes..i did drop by"
"How was it ?"
"You know what they say.... you can go back to an old house.... but you can never go home again"

I never heard from her again.

Cliché

2009-05-26T17:39:00.002+05:30

The long shadows of twilight long past..a dim memory...

Light is no longer welcome in this room...
nor is life.

The phones have been switched off...the doors locked...the windows shaded.
All that remains is me.
sitting on my throne of broken dreams and shattered sanity...
unmoving as the cobwebs gently caress my limbs
a new embrace...a much gentler embrace

As the body decays, the mind is set free of frivolous thoughts
It blossoms and expands
reaching out across the lands and beyond them
Set free from physical limitations
It begins a new journey

Every word from every line above is a cliché, in my mind... a typical ranting.. but then, whats wrong with that ?

An industrial fairy tale

2009-01-08T17:56:00.001+05:30

Finally decided to post this....been sitting on my desktop for too long....
===================================================================
Once upon a time…long long Looonnngggg ago… in a land not far from here…
There existed an industrial wasteland… a dilapidated skeleton of a city…

And in this city, there lived a princess.
And in the wonderfully green outskirts… there lived a frog.

Let’s have a look at this rather wonderful frog first…
Imagine a perfectly normal frog….green mottled and slimy… with a marked penchant for large irradiated flies…
But ! on second glance… not a normal frog at all…

After all, how many frogs do we see walking upright, wearing a top hat, smoking a cigarillo… reading “the complete works of ShakySpears” and listening to an xpod** ?
( **for the techno geeks… an xpod is similar to an ipod in every way except for its near limitless memory…due to the fact that its hard drive is located mainly in hyperspace and is connected to the player via a small localized wormhole )

Well, our rather well read and technically cool frog is sauntering down a country lane, immersed in his book, with not a care in the world***
(***apart from the afore mentioned irradiated flies… which were wrecking havoc in the pseudo spatial gaming parlors…but that’s a story for another day)
When suddenly, a sweet singing stops him dead in his tracks… and the book drops to the damp ground, unnoticed… the froggie rock blaring from his headphones forgotten…
Quietly he creeps around the corner and see’s a vision of beauty lighting up the blasted landscape.

She’s sitting in her six-legged monkey drawn carriage, gently fanning herself while singing the sweetest melody the frog had ever heard from a cybernetically enhanced throat….

Ol’ Frog takes a swig from his hip flask, screws up his dutch courage….and hops across to the princess…

He looks up at the princess and asks “ croak croak croakty croak ?”

“Excuse me, Sir Frog… let me switch on my universal translator”
Click..whirr..click click whirr….
“Now, would you repeat yourself ?”

The frog clears his throat and once again pipes up…
“ My dear lady… would you, by any chance, happen to be a princess ?”

The princess looks down her extremely long nose at the tiny frog, while sticking her chin up into the air at a haughty angle ****
(****this mysterious trick of looking down on someone while sticking one’s chin in the air is a trick mastered only by women and the University of Blecklespeck long ago went bankrupt trying to solve it)

“Why, Sir frog, I shall, for this once, forgive your ignorance… putting it down to you being a simple country oaf”
“I am the Princess of 99”

Frog gaped at her..awestruck
Although he had no clue as to what a princess of 99 was supposed to be, it seemed suitably impressive for his purposes….

Bowing low, he murmurs “ forgive my insolence, O honored Princess of 99… your praises have long been sung far and wide across the land”

“ya right” she replies… somehow managing to look exotic even while frowning…
“do you know..frog legs are considered a delicacy in certain circles ?”

“umm…well…umm” his face going pale.

She sniggered…”Be at ease, Sir Frog…..am just fucking with u”

“oh well.. heh…nice one” still pale.

“So, el froggo… whatcha want ?”

“Weeeelllll…there’s this legend in our family that been handed down generation by generation….that we were once rather handsome humans and belonged to a great family of scientists but a genetic experiment gone wrong turned us into frogs….and only a kiss from a princess can cure this”.
“ewww…I hope you don’t expect me to… ??”
“I was hoping so”
The princess sat back thoughtfully…. Maybe something could be gained from this..
====================================================================
ooops...coz that'll be it till post 21st Jan... seems my clients have forgotten there's a recission going on....and my bosses have suddenly remembered there is one...sigh....
well....i can tell u that this will not end as expected....but many exciting things are yet to happen to froggie....
ps - thanks to CG for the inspiring this story......

My Friend

2009-01-06T23:16:00.001+05:30

She is my friend and is with me nearly all the time....

She always joins me when I drink, and we get along just fine.....

Nobody has ever seen her, Im the only one.....

Seemingly I must be mad but insanity is fun.....

Doctors say she's just a figment of my twisted mind....but her eyes haunt me all the time....

If they cant see her they must be going blind

Two men dressed in white collected me two days ago....They said there's only room for one and she cant go....

I cant even ring her cause she doesn't have a phone.....Hasnt got a home

Life is very gloomy in my little padded cell.....Its a shame there wasnt room for her as well.....

HUMBUG !!!!

2008-12-24T14:06:00.001+05:30

'Twas the night before Christmas - Old Santa was pissed,
He cussed out the elves and threw down his list.
Miserable little brats, ungrateful little jerks,
I have good mind to scrap the whole works.

I've busted my ass for damn near a year,
Instead of "Thanks Santa" - what do I hear?
The old lady bitches cause I work late at night,
The elves want more money - The reindeer all fight.

Rudolph got drunk and goosed all the maids,
Donner is pregnant and Vixen has AIDS.
And just when I thought that things would get better,
Those assholes from IRS sent me a letter.

They say I owe taxes - if that ain't damn funny,
Who the hell ever sent Santa Claus any money?
And the kids these days - they all are the pits,
They want the impossible... Those mean little shits.

I spent a whole year making wagons and sleds,
Assembling dolls... Their arms, legs and heads.
I made a ton of yo yo's - No request for them,
They want computers and robots... they think I'm IBM!

If you think thats bad... just picture this,
Try holding those brats... with their pants full of piss.
They pull on my nose - they grab at my beard,
And if I don't smile... the parents think I'm weird.

Flying through the air... dodging the trees,
Falling down chimneys and skinning my knees.
I'm quitting this job... there's just no enjoyment,
I'll sit on my fat ass and draw unemployment.

There's no Christmas this year...now you know the reason,
I found me a blonde... I'm going SOUTH for the season!!

A dream

2008-12-19T15:10:00.002+05:30

He leaned back in his chair…. Looking on quietly… unable to tear his eyes away even for a second…
Looking at her as she lay curled up against the huge pillow… eyes closed… peace written all over her face…
She looked so much younger….dwarfed against that huge cushion… he could almost see the reflection of the child she had been….the worry lines around her eyes seemed to fade as she smiled…
He wondered what she was dreaming…. Would he be in those dreams ?

His smile faded as he realized… it would soon be time to wake her up…
There were others who had a greater claim to her time than he did… and they would soon begin wondering where she was…
She had come to him directly from the airport… and he feared the questioning “raised eyebrow” looks they would get…
Well…it would be faced when the time came… something had to be done…

Until then… it was time to end the dreams…

the seeking

2008-12-19T15:02:00.001+05:30

They walked across the endless plains… no destination in mind
No destination….
But with a purpose firmly etched in their minds
With a hope of meeting their destiny and embracing it…
They walked….
Heedless of the hot sands and the cool grasses
Headless of shady forests and towering ruins….
They walked….
Their passing disturbed shadows and the beasts stirred…. Watching from a far with malevolent eyes…

Chasing the darkness which seemed to flee… forever a step ahead… but always tantalizingly within reach…They walked….

Stumbling upon a page from the past

2008-12-10T19:58:00.001+05:30

Tinkering around… visiting a few blogs… I came across a familiar name….
A name I haven’t thought about for a long time…and on the rare occasions I do remember…it’s with disdain tempered by a pinch of confusion.
But once that name was synonymous with every thought…with every plan for the future…

Interestingly…I expected to read this person’s blog and feel a rush of memories flood in… but that just did not happen…
As I read on…into older and older posts…looking for something I could identify with… I came to realize… that if what this person has written reflects the true personality, then I never knew or understood who this person actually was.
Not in one single post could I see “my version” of that person….

Was I simply blind ? or was I misled ?

In a way, it’s a relief…
And in some others… a disappointment

Sometimes I think I have a perverse desire to dig into the past and bring up questions like ….How ? Why ? and all that… I guess many of us do that…
Either way… it’s a chapter well left buried…

Of gods and men....

2008-12-04T17:01:00.001+05:30

I recently read an article with the above title and it struck me as quite pretinent.... are we, as indians, truly as proud of our diversity as we tell the tourists ? Or is is just another tag line for the globalising India... "Unity in Diversity" yey !!... while nursing in our hearts contempt for those weird accented foreigners who somehow became part of "OUR" india.I doubt there are many among us who have not used reagionalism or religion to vent on those "Intellectually pseudo bongs" or those "Rude and uncouth punjabis" and so on and so forth... the best of us have done it...
Gods were once icons of hope...prosperity...love...now all they represent ( whether we admit it or not ) is hate. well..."now" is of course not the apt word...its been going on for centuries...around the world...but i would like to think we'ed have evolved as humans by now.... instead we seem to be degenerating into the dark ages once again.
Being a staunch supporter of globalisation and a firm believer in capitalism.... I think these are the religions that will see us through and not the million or so "almighties".
The poor man is screwed either ways...so might as well make the most of it...

YOUR FIRED !!!

2008-12-03T14:34:00.001+05:30

Hmm…”firing” seems to be the frayed and over used buzz word of the day….
Whether we look at it in the context of pink slips with an image of Donald Trump pointing at us and telling us to fuck off…( at least that’s the image that comes to my mind )
Or we look at it in the context of what’s been on television the past week…. “firing at Taj” “more firing at Oberoi” “a little more firing at CST” “yet more firing at Nariman House”
…yes…I am starting to get sick of the word…
But this is not yet another rant against the unjust world , corrupt politicians and our ineptness at being decent human beings…I guess we’ve all posted to our blogs…discussed it in office…sent patriotic emails ad nauseam…
My dilemma has more of a personal…selfish nature…
I feel as if I’m sitting in this ivory tower watching these events pass me by as if on a television screen…
Me ? I can never get fired. Me ? terrorists are never going to attack ME ! these things only happen to strangers…
I find myself in a situation in which I am unable to care about these strangers as I am “expected” to do… sure I make the appropriate comments….pay lip service to whatever is considered to be the “in thing” but all I think is..yawn…so what’s new ?
I wonder how long I’ll be able to insulate myself from the world ? I don’t even know if it’s a good or bad thing…. But there it is… and no apologies..

giving up....

2008-11-09T16:18:00.001+05:30

He turned off the television….no longer able to make sense of the swimming images in front of him.
Shaking his head to rid it of the strange cobwebs that had settled there, he got up and wandered around the dark apartment.
His body seemed heavier than ever…. Like dragging around a dead weight tied to the ankles…. He knew the weight could be shaken off and the cobwebs cleared…. He had done it before… hypnotizing himself with happy thoughts of times gone by….and fantasies of times to come….
But today was different…. He could feel it….he felt himself loosing the struggle to maintain the façade…even in his own mind…. He was tired of fooling himself.
After a few aimless circuits of all the rooms…. He made up his mind… or more accurately….he simply gave in…to what seemed inevitable
After all, who would blame him? All the justifications were right there, he thought.
Now, after giving up the struggle, he felt more at ease with the mists surrounding his mind……a fog that dimmed out reality settled on him.
“Best if I turn my phone off…. Don’t want anything to spoil the mood” he told himself…. One of his last lucid thoughts… and eager to be gone, at that.
He had what he needed… he always did… and he collected the things together and kept them on the table in front of him…neatly, in order of how he would need to use them….the process seemed natural….like a ritual done hundreds of time….
Peace would finally be his….. It would no longer matter what happened…he smiled as he realized… he simply did not have to care any longer.
The darkness came, creeping over him, giving him the comfort he craved, and he pulled it over him, like a child pulling its security blanket…
He smiled then….and a single tear rolled down one eye….

"Forgive them for they know not what they do!"

2008-10-06T03:29:00.001+05:30

It’s hard to fathom why we treat each other like we do… but we do it, for the most part unknowing of how it would affect those whose lives are attached to ours like strings… our every action sending vibrations across unguessed paths…
Have you ever been treated so bad that forgiveness can never happen?
Friends betrayed you. You got a Judas Kiss. These are some examples of pain and suffering and not wanting to forgive. Yes! We want them to pay for hurting us so badly. We want them to get there just reward. But anger and the inability puts a chain around our necks and it leaves ushurt and damaged and unable to move on.
Forgiveness is like the aroma of a flower being stepped on by your heel. It has a sweet smell even though the damage has been done.
As the song goes....." The memory now..is like the picture was then.....once its been crumpled...it cant be perfect again"
To be able to grow and move on with life one must be able to forgive, but that is not saying to forget and to not remember what they have done. It is just not holding it to their account anymore.
It is a bitter sweet experience. It takes time and one must deal with the consequences of their actions but to be able to set your spirit free, you must find a way to be able to move on and let it go.
Sometimes we do stupid stuff and can't believe we were capable of doing such things. But we must also forgive ourselves. It is the key to unlocking many doors.

I forgive you all....for leaving....for dying....for not understanding....
I wish I,too could be forgiven……

The Second Coming by W. B. Yeats

2008-09-15T18:35:00.001+05:30

Normally wouldnt put up something not written by myself, but just wanted to share this....

Turning and turning in the widening gyre
The falcon cannot hear the falconer;
Things fall apart; the centre cannot hold;
Mere anarchy is loosed upon the world,
The blood-dimmed tide is loosed, and everywhere
The ceremony of innocence is drowned;
The best lack all conviction, while the worst
Are full of passionate intensity.
Surely some revelation is at hand;
Surely the Second Coming is at hand.
The Second Coming! Hardly are those words out
When a vast image out of Spiritus Mundi
Troubles my sight: somewhere in sands of the desert
A shape with lion body and the head of a man,
A gaze blank and pitiless as the sun,
Is moving its slow thighs, while all about it
Reel shadows of the indignant desert birds.
The darkness drops again; but now I know
That twenty centuries of stony sleep
Were vexed to nightmare by a rocking cradle,
And what rough beast, its hour come round at last,
Slouches towards Bethlehem to be born?

Dead dogs on the road...never look at them too close,do we ?

2008-02-12T23:25:00.001+05:30

There are stories that are true, in which each individual's tale is unique and tragic.And the worst tragedy is that we've heard it all before...and we cannot allow ourselves to feel it too deeply.We build a shell around it..this is how we walk ,talk and function...day in and day out...immune to other's pain and loss...which,if it were to touch us..would cripple us...but,for the most..we do not let it...we cannot risk it. Tonight,as you eat...reflect if you can...there are children starving in numbers large enough to numb the mind...you might find it uncomfortable..or you might not,but still...you will eat. Women..men...old and young..there are so many of them and so many of their stories are tragedies with griefs too deep to be contained...but here and there tiny joys...beacons of hope can be snatched from the darkness...enabaling us to maintain our own personal impressions of sanity.
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"No man"proclaimed ..well..someone..."is an island"and he was wrong. If we were not islands,we would be lost..drowned in each others tragedies. we are insluated for the sadness of others by our very "island" nature and the repetitive shape and form of these stories...for every story begins and end like this....there was a human being who was born...lived...and died. the rest are just details..which we may fill in with our own experiences. Infact...to wax a bit eloquent and a bit off the point (as if there is a point to the whole thing )...There is nothing more unoriginal than life...like snowflakes..each life is unique in detail...but they'er still all the same...
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sorry...still havent reached that place where i can make my point....but will do..in the meant time...any comments ?

alienation

2007-09-10T19:05:00.001+05:30

Everyone has felt lonely at one time or another, regardless of their magnitude of wealth, size of family, extension of the friendship circle, or position in a crowd. It crawls on your skin like a shadow, quickly making it’s way into your heart. Once you have experienced this alienation you will never forget it, and you can never adequately explain the depth of it.

What fools we mortals be....

2007-09-10T15:36:00.001+05:30

Love is the most destructive emotion n the world. it maybe argued that hate ( the equal and opposite and thus the appropriate comparision ) is the more destructive of the two...afterall,it has caused wars and murders unending throught histroy...so i guess it is the more overt of the two. but love,now THAT is the more covert and potent destroyer...it anahilates the very thoughts of a person and hollows out the soul until only an empty illogical shell is left "existing" ( if it can be called even that)Those who hate look down into the abyss and smile...and leap. Those who love,do not even notice the deapth of darkness....blind love ??? huh. So which then is worse ?

note on consumerism no.2

2007-08-22T15:37:00.001+05:30

I define consumerism as the voluntary suspension of disbelief in the value of material goods . Suspension of disbelief is desirable when viewing a fantasy world such as a stage play or motion picture, and it is also necessary in modern shopping, and for exactly the same reason — the things on display cannot meaningfully be compared with reality.
Consumerism is itself divided into two subcategories, reactive consumerism and proactive consumerism. Reactive consumerism (hereinafter RC) awaits a public demand for a product and, no matter how absurd the demand, fills it. Proactive consumerism (hereinafter PC) uses advertising to create markets for products that have no natural market.
Before going on, I must add that PC isn't always as parasitic as it might sound on first hearing. Sometimes a perceived need is created out of nowhere, and this engineered need leads to a societal advance — a self-fulfilling prophecy, if you will. For example, education is a form of PC — it appears to convey knowledge, when in fact its real purpose is to create a lifelong taste for knowledge. But to the original target audience of young people (and, sadly, to some of their parents), the "product" being offered has no obvious purpose — an acquired taste for ideas makes young people nearly uncontrollable, rebellious, doubtful of received wisdom. Only later in life does this fondness for ideas bear fruit, at a time (in the brief and brittle lifecycle of the average human brain) when it would be nearly impossible to instill the taste anew.
RC can exist in times of deficit, because it only springs to life in response to voiced demand. But PC, the practice of creating a market and then serving it, can only exist in times of surplus. In RC, advertising is an adjunct, a facilitation of the basic process of producing and distributing goods. In PC, advertising is the process — everything else depends on it.

note on consumerism no.1

2007-08-22T15:14:00.001+05:30

It is possible to examine nearly any aspect of modern society — the conduct of war, government, marriage, education — and find a similar practice, an earlier version, in history. In most cases, the seeds of the present can be seen in the past. But this is not true for consumerism, for consumerism has no parallel in early human societies.
The closest thing to consumerism — and this is offered only as a point of reference, not comparison — is the practice of barter. In barter, two or more individuals met and exchanged what they had for what they didn't have. Advertising either didn't exist or was very primitive, and there was no hierarchy — no natural division between producers and consumers, because everyone was both a producer and a consumer.
The motivation for barter was also much more basic — the point was to avoid being dead. It was very straightforward — you could trade your surplus of corn for some arrowheads, or for the services of a mercenary to guard your cornfield, or simply to avoid an untimely death. You could instead keep the corn and hope no one attacked your field, but over time it may have come to you that hiring a mercenary, or owning some arrowheads, would increase the amount of corn you actually kept for more than a few days.

a little bit of angst

2007-08-22T15:09:00.001+05:30

The apathy of modern day life..a rather convinient phrase that cropped up recently in a
conversation...and i feel,a rather true one.Of course it may be argued otherwise that "modern day life" is anything but aphatetic, that
there is energy..sometimes boundlessly unhealthy amounts of it.and therein lies the real apathy....The comfort zone of cynisism,the search for the highways in hiding(a borrowed phrase),pride in lonliness and the degeneration of the natural self...all signs of this apathy